Such an interesting week to be an American . . . The week started off with protests against Columbus Day in Mexico – apparently, they’re still a bit peeved down there about all the white European folks coming to their country and taking all the good jobs. And like my high school choir, the New York City Columbus Day parade was short a couple of Sopranos. Speaking to an acquaintance in Los Angeles, I was asked whether the gyms in Chicago had nightclubs inside. When I asked what she was talking about, she responded, “Didn’t you hear about the terrorist bombings in the nightclubs at Ballys?” Nostradamus predicted the winter of 2002 would be ushered in by a “ . . .battle to the finish between the righteous forces of Heaven and the earthbound titans.” While many conspiracy theorists are trying to tie this prediction in with the approaching Bush family vendetta against Iraq (Sponsored by Halliburton – “We’re Beatrice!”) others simply believe the prediction merely points to the Angels-Giants World Series. Over on the east coast, people are thanking their lucky stars that the voices of reason prevailed when they changed the name of the Washington D.C. basketball team due to its violent implications. So, despite the relative success of Michael Jordan’s Washington Wizards, it seems they’re well on their way to being outscored by the bullets this season. TV shrink Dr. Phil was asked to comment on the possible motivation of the sniper and he said, “You don’t bake your biscuits by setting the barn on fire. . .” Expert analysts believe the sniper will be caught and convicted long before anyone has a clue what the hell Dr. Phil is talking about. Isn’t it time a voice of reason came from the throngs of humanity to bring solace and understanding to all mankind? I think it is. Until then, however, we’ll just have to make do with the comedy of David Robinson. It’s much easier to comprehend and can be seen and heard TOMORROW, Thursday, October 17th at Zanies (1548 N. Wells, Chicago, IL 60610 312-337-4027) at 8:30 for the low, low price of $16 and a two drink minimum. For that, you also get several other featured comedians – the types who’ve appeared on TV and such – and, of course a lovely night out on the town. And what could be better than that? Actually, I don’t know – ask me after the show.

 

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